


the one where tsutomu has a sexuality crisis (feat. tendou being a great senpai)

by XxDark_WinngsxX



Series: Shiratorizawa is gay [2]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: How Do I Tag, M/M, Not Beta Read, Sexuality Crisis, fuck tagging shit goodly, goshiki is confused, its 2 am ive been writing for hours, kinda Crack but not really, the ending is rushed im sorry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-04
Updated: 2021-02-04
Packaged: 2021-03-15 19:47:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,686
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29194785
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/XxDark_WinngsxX/pseuds/XxDark_WinngsxX
Summary: goshiki doesnt know hes allowed to like boys until he notices some thingsalt. title: volleyball is gay
Relationships: Goshiki Tsutomu & Tendou Satori, Shirabu Kenjirou/Semi Eita, Ushijima Wakatoshi/Tendou Satori, bunch of minor ships i cant be bothered to tag
Series: Shiratorizawa is gay [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2147169
Comments: 8
Kudos: 92





	the one where tsutomu has a sexuality crisis (feat. tendou being a great senpai)

**Author's Note:**

> holy shit something not named after a song? wow

The first time Tsutomu thought about boys liking boys was when he accidentally walked in on his senpai’s doing something he most likely wasn’t supposed to see.

Tsutomu smiled as he made his way to Tendou’s room, excited to talk to his favourite senpai outside of practice. He went to open the door to Tendou’s and Ushijima’s shared room, stopping when he heard weird voices and sounds from inside. 

“Wakatoshi! Stop it! Tsutomu is coming over later.” He heard Tendou whine, and a low growling-esque noise. He knew it was a bad idea, but his curiosity got the best of him and he peeked open the door slightly, stopping as he saw Ushijima straddling Tendou, kissing his neck.

His eyes widened, as he stared at the two boy’s laying on Tendou’s bunk. He didn’t understand, that was the kind of thing a boy and a girl who like-liked did, not two boys who are friends. He continued to stare, his confusion quickly morphing into embarrassment as he quickly shut the door when Ushijima started to undress Tendou. 

He walked quickly back to his own room, thought’s racing through his head as he kept his gaze to the floor. He entered his dorm and buried his face into a pillow, trying to block out everything and focus on what just happened. 

“Tendou, and Ushijima-senpai?” He muttered to himself, trying to wrap his head around what he just witnessed. Can boys like other boys? Is that a thing? HIs brows were knit together tightly as he thought about it more. 

He was only dragged out of his thoughts by his phone ringing, the caller ID reading “Tendou-Senpai” He answered the call, even though he was still confused.

“Hello, Tendou-Senpai!” He said happily as he picked up the phone, trying to ignore what happened and focus on hanging out with his favourite senpai. 

“Hey Tsutomu! When are you dropping by?” Tendou asked, sounding as excited as Tsutomu was. 

“Can I head over now?” The younger asked, already standing up.

“Sure!” Tendou said, his smile evident in his voice. Tsutomu was already forgetting about the incident, pushing it to the far back of his mind.

\--------------------

The second time Tsutomu thought about two boys being together romantically was when he was in the wrong place at the wrong time. 

After a long practice session Tsutomu was ready to relax, but he realised he left his phone in the locker room. He sighed as he turned around, making his way back to the locker room, stopping as he heard two familiar voices from inside. 

“I know, Kenjirou. I’m so sorry.” He heard Semi say from his spot against the wall outside the locker room. This definitely was a conversation he wasn’t supposed to hear, but he really needed his phone. Semi sounded so sad, it made Tsutomu sad too.

“This isn’t fucking fair!” He heard Shirabu shout, his voice shaky like he was holding back tears. Tsutomu was worried, Shirabu doesn’t seem like someone to get sad easily, so hearing him sound so vulnerable was kind of scary.

“I know, but there isn’t anything we can do about it.” Semi’s voice sounded soft, but Tsutomu could tell he also was about to cry. 

“Why is it such a bad thing that we’re in love?” Shirabu yelled. What. In love? Shirabu and Semi? Tsutomu’s brows furrowed as he thought back to Ushijima and Tendou, the way they were being so intimate with each other, and now Semi and Shirabu saying they love each other?

He could get his phone later.

\-------------------

The third time Tsutomu thought about it was later that same day, when he was laying in bed, trying to sleep.

He hadn’t been able to stop thinking about it, or the incident with Ushijima and Tendou, for the rest of the day. He went back an hour later and was able to get his phone, but that had done nothing to help calm his nerves. 

Anytime someone had tried to talk to him he’d flinch and start rambling about something stupid, not wanting to talk about his “problem” with anyone in case it was all one big misunderstanding.

He stared up, the darkness of his shared dorm helping calm him, though only by a small margin. The more he thought about it, the more he realised something. 

He didn’t like girls. 

At least not in the way he was supposed to. He had nothing against females, he just didn't like-like them. He’d known for a while, but he always pushed it aside. It’ll happen soon. He told himself, believing that every man had a woman waiting for him and vice versa, but it never did. He never felt warm and fuzzy around any girl like everyone else did, but he never told anyone. 

The more he thought, the more he realised he really needed to talk to someone about this. He didn’t even know if you could like someone the same gender as yourself, but the more he thought about it the more it made him think about himself like that. With another man. 

He imagined holding his hand, maybe even kissing, and though the man never had any identifying features, always just some relatively good looking dude, it felt more right then it ever had been when he thought about girls. 

The more he indulged in these thoughts the more scared he got at the thought of it all being a misunderstanding, that he had to be just like everyone else, that the way he felt was wrong, it's scary, but it's also the most himself he's felt in a long time, excluding when he played volleyball.

He fell asleep to the thoughts of him in a relationship with another man. 

\--------------------

The fourth time Tsutomu thought about his sexuality it was during a practice match against Date Tech.

He’d already been distracted by thinking about the whole ‘boys liking boys’ thing, that he hadn’t even considered actually catching feelings for one. 

But Koganegawa Kanji is a different breed entirely. 

There was something about him that was so different, but it was so nice. Maybe it was the way that he towered over practically everyone, or the obnoxious way he styled his hair, maybe it's the way he is always energetic and putting things in a positive light. Maybe it was all of those things, or none of them, Tsutomu didn’t know which but he did know that Koganegawa made him feel warm and fuzzy, just like how the boys in his junior high school described how they felt about the girls.

Competing against Koganegawa was quite a challenge. Not only is he making the game more challenging, he’s also making concentrating more challenging, at least for Tsutomu.

He messed up a lot, and that just got him even more flustered. They still won, but it wasn’t easy. Tsutomu couldn't help but stare as the captain of Date Tech kissed the tall and slightly scary boy with white hair on the forehead after the game. He didn’t mean to be rude, it’s just that he’d never seen someone be open about that yet.

\--------------------

The fifth time Tsutomu had an encounter with homosexuality he decided to finally talk to someone about it. 

It wasn’t even a big thing that happened, he just saw two male classmates holding hands, which in itself isn’t even inherently romantic. But when he saw it he knew he needed to talk to someone about this or he might just explode. 

After classes he makes his way to Tendou’s room, making sure to knock, not wanting to walk in on something and have even more stuff to think about. 

“Hey Tsutomu, do you need something?” Tenduo asked when he opened the door, noticing the concentrated but confused expression on his kouhai’s face. 

“Tsutomu?” Tendou repeated, snapping his fingers in front of the younger's face. 

“Ah, right! Tendou-senpai! I need to talk to you about something important!” Tsutomu said, his shoulder’s going rigid. 

“Alright, come in.” Tendou said, stepping aside from the door. Tsutomu realised Ushijima wasn’t in the room, he was kind of glad, he knows the ace isn’t good with emotions, which is fine, it’s just that emotions is exactly what this talk is supposed to be about. 

“Sit.” Tendou said, patting the spot next to him on the bottom bunk. “So, what’s up?” The redhead asked, turning to the wannabe ace. 

Tsutomu’s eyes widened as he realised he was actually doing this. He opened his mouth to say something, before closing it, and then ultimately deciding to just say it, like ripping off a bandaid. 

“Can boys like other boys? Like romantically?” Tsutomu asked, his voice cracking slightly. Tendou clearly wasn’t expecting this, his eyes widening at the question. 

“I mean, yeah, there isn’t anything wrong with it.” Tendou said, still somewhat confused by the question. 

Tsutomu looked at Tendou with a shocked expression. “Really?” Tsutomu asked, confusing Tendou even more. 

“Yeah, I mean some people might have a problem with it but they are stupid.” Tendou said, looking at his now relieved kouhai. 

“Oh thank goodness.” Tsutomu said quietly, most of his nerves from before washed away. “If so, Tendou?” Tsutomu asked, turning to look directly at Tendou. 

“Yeah ‘Tomu?” Tendou said, looking at Tsutomu with a lazy smile. 

“Do you like-like Ushijima-senpai? Tsutomu asked innocently, causing Tendou to choke on air. 

“Huwha?” Tendou said eliquitly, causing Tsutomu to look at him worriedly. 

“Are you okay, Tendou-Senpai?” Tsutomu asked, reaching out to Tendou, unsure of what to do. 

“Aughm, Sorry Tsutomu, choked on air haha. But to answer your question, yes I like-like Wakatoshi and yes, he knows, and yes, he also likes-likes me.” Tendou said, ruffling Tsutomu’s hair.

“Wait, are you two like dating?” Tsutomu asked, eyes wide and curious. 

“Yes, Tsutomu, me and Wakatoshi are dating.” Tendou said, a small smile on his face. 

“Woah! That’s so cool, Tendou-Senpai!” Tsutomu exclaimed, a wide smile on his face.

“Well I’m glad I could help.” Tendou said, stretching and leaning backwards. 

“Thank you, Tendou-Senpai!” Tsutomu said, before running out the door, happy to finally have closure.

**Author's Note:**

> do yall want a semishira thing that explains whats happening between them?


End file.
